Oh the Places You’ll Go! LDS Version

Ok, it’s long but stick with it, it’s very good.

OH, THE PLACES YOU’LL GO

Salutations! I’m writing to say,
I’m off to great places! I’m off and away!
My mind is wide open, I’m ready to choose,
I can see for myself, I can see through the ruse,
I’m off and away, and I choose where I go.
I’m in charge of myself, to flourish and grow.

I’d rather be open, to wonder and doubt,
than closed by belief, day in and day out.
I’ll read what I want, I’ll drink what I dare,
You’ll still judge my choice, although I don’t care.

With a free-thinking mind and my eyes open wide,
I’ll guide my own life, spare me your scorn and chide.
I’m off! Truth here I come! To Boyd I’ll pay no mind,
for all truth is useful, even the non-Mormon kind!

Empirical fact, to truth is the key,
John 8 fills my mind: “The truth sets you free”

It’s my goal in life, my aim, my apogee.
From now on, only the truth will lead me.

History has a way you see, of coming back around.
Even when its white washed, or put deep underground.

After searching the web, I see my life’s been spent,
in service of a church, whose honesty is bent.

Most folks don’t like being duped, just you wait and see.
They’ll see your skewed truth as blatant dishonesty.

I’m sure you’ll quip: “He’s nuts! He’s lost to apostasy!”
Clever lies and half-truths won’t keep all of us in,
and droves will leave when with Google they begin.
Steel in the new world? Horses and chariots? Nope.
I say dear brethren, adieu! These stories have no hope.

Surely native ancestry, will exonerate Joe’s claim?
From Asian lines not Jew, are whence the red man came.

Science gives apologists a real sense of dread,
their answers make scholars scratch their head.

The versions of the first vision are quite a few.
Same with history and doctrines; what’s really true?

It’s so confusing—one day it’s this, the next it’s that.
What was it again, special stones or a magic top hat?

“No! It was no such thing!” “Peep stones and a top hat?”
“That’s not faith promoting!” “Who would swallow that gnat?!”

This is a choice you’re sure to regret…
but serving up camel is not the safer bet!

“How noble and pure Joseph was, just look!”
“Young boy, to stave the pain you must imbibe.”
“No sir! I’d rather endure pain by my dad’s side.”

What’s this? Smith had a bar? Wine in Carthage jail?
Give that answer in Sunday school and you fail.

Joe had many wives, but leaders from this always shy.
Past nor present, our leaders won’t openly confide.
Why veil god’s command? Must have something to hide.

“Surely we can explain! It’s not as it seems!”
Spare me! Real men don’t marry girls of fourteen!

“Ol’ Brigham, he’s prone to false doctrine and blasphemies.”
“Blood atonement and Adam God are just theories.”
Silly me, I thought he was the prophet, wasn’t he?
We won’t talk about the Meadows or John Lee
but was there a slip, a lapse, with the prophetic keys?

I’m beginning to think there were no keys to begin with…

With sourced truth all around, what are we to conclude?
Is all of Mormon history, deliberately skewed?

The answer I might’ve found, had the latter-day prophets sought,
at least to be forthright, but forthright they are not.

Years past, faithful stalwarts had to dig and comb,
to see the history and roots from whence they’d come.
Rules were quickly set, making examples of some.
Like my friend Paul T, a scholar among six:
“Opine church history, will you? Have him nixed!”

To doubt was apostate. To question was heresy.
Sharing ideas with friends, was considered mutiny.

For days I could write the absurdities of Bruce R.
“The time for black priesthood is still quite far.”
“As a man only was how he gave the speech.”
Isn’t the pulpit where the prophets reveal and teach?
Not to worry, Spencer flipped ol’ Bruce on his head,
and saved our blessed “Y” having its accreditation shed.

Seems to me most convenient,
while at times change avoidant,
a prophet and god can sway,
and bow to what the masses say.

Ten percent’s a steep demand,
and even the poor must sacrifice.
Shouldn’t we all pay worship,
without money and without price?

“What to do with this tithe?” A mall you say? Am I awake?
How much for such a mall? “Just a few BILLION give or take.”

For one, shouldn’t we leave the ninety and nine?
“Trouble with doctrine? Get out! Or fall in line!”
“Poor boy, you’ve used the atonement to get out of a bind?”
“Stay home, we’ve raised the bar! We don’t need your kind!”
“Interested in the same sex? We don’t buy your bluff, your knuckles aren’t yet broken or bloody enough.”

Homosexuality, hmm, anomaly or fate?
Thanks, but I’ll side with science, it leaves out the hate.
How many bright lives are lost because of this…
whose end comes undue, too soon, like Stuart Matis?
Oh the heartache and tears you could have spared,
if you’d just offered that their burden be shared.

Instead, we’re offered a love with conditions,
from leaders at pulpits with elevated positions.

If twenty years back, a saint like Carol Lynn,
she loving all, or voices like John Dehlin…
these forward thinkers, these lovers of all,
their fate would’ve been seen all over the wall;
Gone! Nixed with the six, slandered and estranged.
But not so, not now, what seems to have changed?

Let’s search and ponder, what is it I wonder?!
You’ll do just about anything, to avoid another PR blunder.
You’ve learned bad press has a way of putting your bottom line asunder.
“Focus groups, what will you say?”
“Surely our image is okay?”
“We should spend millions for their expert advice!”
Silly me, but why doesn’t inspiration suffice?

Seems just a little strange, that the prophets of god,
would fail to foresee, what Google would laud.

“By single lines we grow.”
“In time the lord will show.”
The cost of a pace so slow?
“Merely a few lost souls.”

“What ever should we do?” “We can’t teach truth pure!”
“Only milk for these sheep, never meat, that’s for sure!”

“Please be patient! Please give us more time,
we’re adjusting the history to make it benign.”
“It’ll be white and delightsome, every last senine!”
“Then with excuse anew, you best fall back in line!”
I’ll stay out of line, I can see through the guise.
I won’t allow the wool to cover my eyes.

To less active, apostates, you plead “Come back!
We’re open now; we’re willing to share the facts!”
Do you think we’re blind and we can’t clearly see
your feigned new resolve for open transparency?
Fool me once and I’m done, you’ve had your shot!
You’re only changing now because you were caught.

Like Dorothy I feel, she being told to pay no mind,
as the curtain parts to show a man standing behind.
After a journey so deep and so long, I need to say:
My trust is broke, this silly game I’ll no longer play.
What’s more, Gordon gave an escape to be had:
“All of its good, every last bit, or all of its bad.”

With this point alone, I have reason to leave.
I consider all the rest, and your store is cleaved.
With my mind opened up, and my past steered by lies,
off I go with the droves, with my path open wide!

Credit to Dr. Seuss, “Oh, The Places You’ll Go”
and to RedBullet750

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About MDarks

This is me. Check out the topics and pages at the top of this page. Thanks for visiting, leave me a comment, share a post, follow the blog, whatever. Thanks for reading, come back soon for more.

Posted on April 4, 2013, in Coming Out, Mormon-isms and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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