My Apostasy

I was raised in a good Christian household (well except that my dad wasn’t there). We went to church. My mom tried her best to get us there if she was working or exhausted from having worked everyday previous. I know, now that I have a job and a daughter, how hard she worked and I only have one job and one child. She is the reason I am the person I am today. I don’t know how she did it all, she always had more than one job, two kids to raise, and no husband. Anyways that’s a tangent for another day on a different blog, back to religion.

I would like to say that I never believed, but that would be a lie. I am sure that I truly believed in most ( I know for a fact that some of the stories I had doubts about) of the tales in the Bible. I have always thought about things scientifically so the most outrageous stories were harder for me to reconcile; the worst of these include Adam/Eve, Noah’s ark, and the thought of Hell.

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.
                                        –Douglas Adams

If a book is written by the knowledge of an all-knowing creator god, it should not have parts that can be interpreted so differently. It should not have blatant scientific fallacies. If that god created the rules of physics they should be able to tell their followers that the moon is reflecting the light of the sun and is not its own light.They would tell the story of the creation of more than four humans that were to populate the Earth (with no genetic abnormalities from inbreeding). They would tell Noah to build a boat much larger than the ark that was built. Approximately 5,000 mammal species, 10,000 bird species, 1,000,000 insect species, and 6,000 reptile species (and remember there were two of each) had to fit on a boat smaller than the Titanic.

Noah’s Ark Vs. Titanic

How would an all-knowing, all-loving/forgiving god would have the “good” kids in heaven forever separated from someone they may love who did not follow some rule that they made and was sent to hell for ETERNAL torture. What kind of heaven would it be to be forever separated from a loved one? The last of my reasons: If this creator were going to share their knowledge and power with the world, why limit it to a single sect? Why would you not share the power and knowledge with every culture? Why are some left out and left to live horrendous lives while a select few live in luxury?

My apostasy was gradual but I can remember a pivotal moment in my journey. In a college English class, at Austin Peay State University, we read The Allegory of the Cave by Plato. The basic of what I got from that lesson is that the reality you know and have been shown may not be the whole truth. I immediately, perhaps subconsciously at first, related this story to my life with religion. That summer was the first time I ever thought of myself as an atheist; a nonbeliever. It was scary. What happens at death? Where did we come from? Why do we exist at all? Those questions are the reason for the reversal of my reversal of faith (read it carefully, it is actually correct).

Near the end of my college life I was introduced to a very cunning and deceptive religion, and I fell for it, hard.


About MDarks

This is me. Check out the topics and pages at the top of this page. Thanks for visiting, leave me a comment, share a post, follow the blog, whatever. Thanks for reading, come back soon for more.

Posted on March 17, 2013, in Christianity, Coming Out, Mormon-isms and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. I love your Noah’s Ark chart. That’s a good analogy.

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